My (not so) Interesting talk

It was a talk about my one saving grace. That's not public speaking, it's swimming.

This is me on my first swimming trip to Germany. I was a shy wonky, awkward child. Hideously clumsy, not very good at sport, and pretty sickly. I was one of those kids that always had a bad chest, my Mum used tyo have to bash me on the back to get the snot out. A doctor suggested I take up swimming to sort my chest out, and amazingly, I was quite good at it. Next thing I know I'm training six hours a day and swimming all over the world. Finally I'd found a place where I didn't look stupid.

I'm still shy. awkward and wonky, and I still swim. I don't race anyone now, but since I can't change who I am, I'll never be good at anything but swimming, so I still do it - for the pure joy of doing something well. In everyday life, I'm Inspector Clouseau, in water I'm Fred Astaire.

You see I'm just made that way, I can't help it - and the things that make me a good swimmer, also make me a physical idiot on dry land.

1. Long armspan means you take far less strokes - you get there quicker. But long gangly arms get in the way when you're not swimming.
2. Long torso and short legs - most people with long bodies have long legs. Having little short legs on the end instead gives you a stronger propellor to push you along. But it also gives you an awkward centre of gravity and makes you VERY un-coordinated out of the pool.
3. Lots of slow twitch muscle means you can convert carbohydrate into energy, using oxygen, that much better. This gives you more endurance, and there's less build up of lactic acid in the muscle - that's what usually gives you that burning feeling in the muscle, and makes it feel sore. But lots of slow twitch muscle gives you slow reactions in normal life- you're body is always behind what it sees.
4. Flexible joints mean you can put you're body in more extreme shapes - leading to a more efficient stroke. But it leads to an ungainly gangliness too.
5. A strong core helps the body withstand the whiplash from all that kicking and bending. It helps you twist and turn. But it also pushes that centre of gravity down, making you totter around when you walk.
6. Being a bloody minded Northerner helps in general though - it teaches you to go on when you don't think you can.

This is Edward Wynn, in the process of setting world record for the fastest tiddlywinks mile. He can't help what he's good at either. You see we're all great some things, and not so good at others. We can't help what those things are, which is what makes us all do different, and so interesting. I think we should celebrate that more.

It said above the stage 'to thine own self be true', that's really what the talk was about.

Oh, and I liked Mark's comment afterwards that I was really saying, "What makes you good also makes you useless".

Comments

[Marcus]

I'm gutted I had to go before I could see this. I'm gutted we didn't have more time. Sorry NP.

[doug]

"In everyday life, I'm Inspector Clouseau, in water I'm Fred Astaire"... love it

Brilliant gig mate, thought it was great - also lovely to (albeit briefly) meet you in person, made even more special by the fact it was facilitated by twitter

[Will]

Great talk NP.

I'm gutted I couldn't meet up with you afterwards.

[Rob Mortimer]

Was a great talk, quite nicely inspiring as well.

Well done!

[np]

Likewise. Funnily enough, I shall be thieving your stuff for something or other today...

[Rob Mortimer]

Mine?? *scratches head* or Marcus?

[np]

BOTH!

[Sacrum]

Warmness

[Rob Mortimer]

I see!
I wonder what on earth for...

Hi Sacrum, hope the many mile are treating you with warmness.

[Mark McGuinness]

Thanks for a great presentation, glad you liked the comment. A shame we didn't get to talk properly but at least we shook hands, which is an improvement on last time! Looking forward to talking more next time...

[Emily]

Hi Andrew.

Lovely to meet you on Saturday. I was really inspired by the words you spoke on stage and that you spotted the inscription: "To thine own self be true" - how important that is!

And I could relate to your journey of discovering that a body 'weirdness' can actually manifest as a talent. I'm super bendy so in yoga classes, I'm the Daddy (as it were...).

See you anon in the blogsphere.

[Carol]

Your speech was simple and clear and very English. It was great to watch and hear how good a speaker you are, your diction is excellent you know. I never knew that about swimmers, but then, it was a whole day of learning and stimulation.

[Anne]

I loved your talk. Thank you. I love swimming as well and am crap at all other sports. I'm quite crap as swimming as well, but liked what you said and the way you said it.

[np]

You are all very nice. Glad you like swimming.
Next time I do a talk it may be about enjoying doing something badly - I'm happily hopeless at weekly five a side

[Stan Lee]

Great illustrations. Did you do them yourself?

[np]

Stan, I'm ashamed to say I did

[Johnnie Moore]

I missed your talk and I love this post!

[Natasja]

I loved your talk, absolutely charming! Thank you so much.

[lauren]

oh damn, my comment didn't work out. well, what i wanted to say the other day was that i had been thinking loads about your talk and what you had to say about being good at what you do. so i quit my shit job and am concentrating doing the things i am good at. thanks so much NP. you're tops.

[np]

Well played Lauren. That's good to know. It's something I'm thinking abuot professionaly too.