It's common for people turning 50 to share the fruits of their experience.
I've just reached that milestone but I won't.
Because I know I'm nothing special.
Because most of these kind of posts are edited versions of the truth.
(Like the case studies that help no one)
Because failure is the greatest teacher.
Because it's useful to know that no matter how old or experienced you get, we all make it up as we go along.
So I'm going to share 50 hard lessons, forged in the furnace of failure and fuck up.
Never crash into a the client CEO's car
Never be more than two drinks behind a client in any situation
Never click reply instead of forward to a client email
Never ignore someone who says you'll never make it to account director because your grasp of detail is shocking
Never agree to lead the agency rebrand or positioning
Never work in an agency where you are judged by how many hours you put in
Never do an all nighter in a converted Church unless you have nerves of steel
Never join an agency with a bad reputation that tells you it's changing
Never criticise someone else's work in an all agency
Never use pretentious words to look clever, it makes you look dumb
Never write propositions like headlines, unless you want your brief to be ignored
Never get cross in creative reviews
Never get cross with people in LinkedIn
In fact never get cross, store the energy to do something about it - change what what you can, endure what you can't
Never speak first in a creative review - let others talk crap while you work our what you think
Never speak first in any meeting if you can help it
Never talk about a client on train, you never know who's listening (it lost someone I know a pitch)
In fact don't talk about work on a train full stop
Never stay in a job the moment you think you don't trust your boss
Never write a strategy with an ad in mind
Never write a great proposition, creative will automatically do the opposite - frame a problem instead
Never fail to serve good tea or coffee to visitors - little things say it the loudest
Never turn up to the wrong venue for a key client meeting
Never work with your client's offspring
Never question the research in the research presentation (kill it later)
Never assume a few people liking your blog or LinkedIn content makes you any good at the actual job
Never sell work with 'according to how brands grow'
Never believe case studies, they are the Instagram version of what happens
Never fail to actually try whatever you're being asked to sell
Never fail to actually shop for what you're selling
Never fail to meet your audience in real life (don't go to the zoo, go the jungle)
Never defend a strategy because it's cool
But never fail to persuade if you know when you believe in your work
But then again, never fight a losing battle
Never forget an idea that never made it, ideas are connections make it fit something else
Never refuse to post rationalise creative if you like it, good work is hard to come by
Never forget to be kind to junior suits, they could end up as you boss, or a client
Never allow people in your team who clearly don't care about the work
Never do a job interview in lycra
Never tolerate a bully (they are still around)
Never fail to defend someone against a bully - one day it could be you
Never criticise another agency's work on LinkedIn
Never tell the client their pitch brief is wrong (let them discover how it inspired you)
Never bother stressing over a pitch until you have wasted half the time (some things never change)
Never write powerpoint without knowing what you want to say
Never lend books to colleagues, yoy never get them back
Never try and look smart - everyone hates smart arses
Never reject the obvious, everyone else does too
Never play contact sport with a client
Never take anything we do seriously, it really isn't life or death
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